Tuesday, July 18, 2017

MMPR Season 3 Episode 24: A Different Shade of Pink Part 2


Tommy Offers His Girlfriend Questionable Bedside Manner
Grim Promises of Horror Threatened by Lizard in Trash Can














Last week on Power Rangers, Kimberly met the world-famous coach Gunthar Schmidt who agreed to train her for the upcoming "Contractual Dispute Games." Rita refused to let Kim have a glimpse of happiness, so she sent down a swarm of goons to draw the Pink Ranger out during her training sessions with Schmidt. Later that night, an exhausted Kimberly went to train by herself inside of the Youth Center. The supposedly-evil Katherine abruptly had a change of heart as she rushed to help Kim, but not before the Ranger Teen fell off the balance beam and appeared to be gravely injured.

This week we begin, quite logically, inside of a hospital. A group of doctors have Kimberly on a gurney as Kat explains her situation. The doctor tells his nurses to take Kim to radiology and wants "the works" done on her. Unfortunately, Katherine has to remind the doctors that Kim's mother doesn't have insurance, so they're forced to stuff her lifeless body in the trash chute.

Inside the Moon Palace, Zedd and Rita demand an explanation for Katherine's sudden betrayal of their orders. Finster shows up with a scroll, for some goddamned reason, and exposits that Katherine's act of goodness shorted out the evil magic. What a bunch of Tinker Bell bullshit. 

Baboo blubbers about whatever half-understood concept entered into his worthless skull, and Zedd responds by blowing him off. Lord Zedd then discusses the issue with characters who matter. The evil overlord makes a decent point that even if Kat is no longer on their side, she still managed to accomplish her goal of taking Kim out of commission. Now, she's become nothing but another target for Zedd and Rita to murder at their soonest convenience.

I love the brass balls on Zedd. He doesn't even attempt to bring Kat back to their side. As soon as she turns coat against them, she's marked for death. It's little touches like this that almost make Lord Zedd look like he's a credible threat. Unfortunately, his primary lot in life is to lose to a bunch of high-school students every single week.

Billy and Tommy meet up at the hospital to check up on Kimberly. Billy asks Tommy how he's holding up, and Tommy points his snout down and pouts. Oddly (strangely) Tommy is far more concerned about how Katherine is handling the whole thing. They then ask aloud why Kat would have been around Kimberly when she had her near-fatal accident in the first place. Aren't these guys supposed to be straight A students? How is this so difficult to piece together? Imagine playing a game of Clue with these jokers. They'd spend half the game asking why Colonel Mustard was spending so much time in the Billiard Room.

Coach Schmidt shows up at the hospital and personally apologizes to Tommy. He says that he feels somehow responsible for Kimberly's condition…which is actually kind of cool. Gunthar Schmidt is a character who's only going to be around for like 3 episodes, so it would have been fine to have him be nothing but a stereotypical brash coach. But this episode takes him just a few steps further into being an actual character.

The doctor drops by and informs our crew that Kimberly is fine, and suffered no lasting damage from her tumble. Billy, Tommy, Kat, and Schmidt all breathe a sigh of relief that Kim is back to normal. Doctor Whoever tells them they can go in and visit her, but should preferably do so one at a time. In order to ensure we definitely hit 3 episodes.

Tommy immediately goes first, because of course he does, and nabs some shitty little stuffed bear he must have bought at the hospital gift shop. Um…Tommy? You know that Kim isn't the one with the Bear Zord right? Who am I kidding? Of course you don't.

Oh yeah, and Kimberly has a few more visitors waiting for her at the hospital.

Ah shit, I accidentally turned on Scrubs.

Yes, even in the ~serious~ episode of Power Rangers, we can't escape the comic goofery of these chucklefucks. Lt. Stone wonders aloud how Bulk and Skull managed to trick him into something so stupid and pointless, which is the same thing I've been asking myself all season. Bulk promises that he won't be disappointed, because they're going to expose that dirty Commie Schmidt for trying to undermine our glorious nation of America. Can't wait for next season, when Bulk and Skull's patriotism becomes even more fervent and they reenact American History X.

Though at least this scene ends with a gag of the three cops getting their cart pushed into a laundry chute. The one thing I wanted out of this scene, so kudos to 'ya Power Rangers.

Adam, Aisha, and Rocky travel together as they get a message from Billy about Kim's condition improving. Good to see these three were forbidden from visiting the hospital until one of the OG 3 Rangers gave them permission. Sorry second-stringers, but you can come up when Tommy is good and goddamned ready to let you.

Zedd and Rita panic that Kimberly has already healed up, and demand to know why Finster hasn't cooked up a new monster yet. Zedd bitches at Rito to go down and beat up those damn teenagers, and has a pretty great line.

"You're usually worthless, but who knows? Maybe this time you'll get lucky!"

What a glorious prick. Just rubbing it right in Rito's bony face how much of a twit he is. But even better is how Rito reacts during this spiel.

Not sure why he's spinning on a rotisserie in this scene.

Tommy walks into Kimberly's room and greets her with a cute little joke about her situation.

"Hey, don't you know you're supposed to land on your feet."

Jesus Christ, Oliver. Maybe save it for after your girl gets out of the fucking hospital. Maybe she fell off that balance beam in an attempt to escape your ceaseless nagging, you worthless canine.

Tommy puts on his Serious Acting Voice™ to console Kimberly. He says he's been deeply worried ever since Rita and Zedd started coming after her. Kim says she's glad he showed up, and thanks him for the cheap stuffed bear he bought her as an afterthought. Tommy asks Kimberly if being in the hospital makes her sad since she has to wear a cone around her neck after she leaves. After this, Kim politely asks Tommy to get out of her room.

On the way to the hospital, Adam, Aisha, and Rocky are stopped by Rito and the Tengas. The replacement trio ninja morph and get into it with the Tengas. Unfortunately, Rito proves too much for Rocky, because any named character is too much for Rocky.

Zordon contacts Tommy and says he's happy to see Kimberly is feeling better. He also asks if she's filled out that paperwork regarding how her accident happened outside of her Ranger priorities and had nothing to do with his "organization." Also, those three simpletons he hired are getting the utter dogshit slapped out of them in the park. Maybe Tommy can stop lollygagging with Kim and go do some work for once.

Kim tries to get up and go along with Tommy and Billy, but Zordon tells her she's in the goddamned hospital. I think five Rangers can handle a gaggle of pigeons and their bone-cad uncle.

Oh yeah, and there's a great juxtaposition in this scene. Tommy smooches Kim on the forehead and silently whispers that he'll be back with her soon. Then the literal very next second, he shouts out "WE NEED NINJA RANGER POWER NOW!" It's fucking hilarious. Oh Tommy, you beautiful mutt.

The five Ninja Rangers join forces and challenge Rito et. all. I sit patiently as I wait for some cool ninja moves and…nope. Nothing. Tommy does that disappearing trick when Rito slashes at him, but that's it. The closest thing we get to sweet karate shit is when Rocky tosses some Tengas into the backseat of his truck.

Tenga gif
Rocky flips the bird

While the Ninja Rangers duke it out with the Tengas, Katherine visits Kimberly in her hospital bed. Kim thanks Kat for saving her life last night, and then asks why the hell she was hanging out near the Youth Center so late. Katherine takes this moment to inform Kim of the following.

I was that cat you guys had around, because my name is Kat and that's what constitutes clever writing in this series. Also, I was always watching while you and Tommy were boning in the back of his Cadillac. And you remember that cat monster you fought like 6 weeks ago? That was me too! But don't be afraid. I'm not actually a cat, merely turned into a cat by some evil witch with Madonna tits who lives on the Moon. She tricked me with a bird and then made me evil or something. But I became good again when I remembered the time I fell off a diving board and hit my head.

Unfortunately the show cuts to commercial before we have to witness Kimberly processing all of this absolute nonsense. All I want is a scene of her listening to this crazy shit and hammering the button that controls her morphenomenal Morphine.

Back at the park, Rito and his pigeons have been subdued. The Ninja Rangers gang up on them, but Rito takes this opportunity to retreat from the battle. The Rangers gripe that they "almost had him," which is ludicrous. You clowns will never kill Rito Revolto. This episodic hootenanny will never end, and you're going to be stuck murdering rubber monsters until the heat death of the universe. Get fucked.

Kat continues explaining what happened to her, and how terrible she feels for Kimberly's current condition. Katherine blames herself and wonders why she couldn't stop doing terrible things. Terrible things such as: Tearing up photographs, sneering at teenagers, tricking police officers by transforming into a cat, and drinking all of Ernie's spoiled milk.

Kim smiles and asks Kat if she knows how Tommy became a Power Ranger in the first place. Katherine says she has no idea, and it seems like we're about to enjoy a somber discussion between the two girls.

Until Tommy barges in, interrupts Kimberly, and sideswipes her story by telling it himself.

Someone put a muzzle on this blustering pooch already. Holy shit.

So now that Katherine has apologized for conspiring to murder Kimberly, the Ranger Teens accept her as their new best pal. Even though she knows their identities, and Zordon said that would be a big no-no if they wanted to retain their powers. Does that become null and void if Rita is the one who spills the beans on their secret? If not, couldn't Rita and Zedd make a monster out of a loud speaker that blares the names of the Power Rangers across the city every day and night? What's all this hullabaloo about cats and gymnastics competitions? These Moon losers are missing the easy way out.

Speaking of our favorite Moon goblins, Rita is currently bitching out her worthless brother for not murdering all those kids for the umpteenth time. Zedd points out that Rito is such a dipshit, he hasn't done anything right since he showed up. Rito protests this in his standard tone, as he bellows "Oh yes I have!" Then a second goes by and Rito's voice falls to a defeated tone as he responds. "Oh…no I haven't."

I'm begging each and every one of you readers to listen to this line, because it's absolutely the best goddamned thing in this show. Rito's entire character is "BWAHAHA I'M A STUMBLING, BUMBLING DUMBASS AND I DON'T CARE BOUT NOTHIN." Then he drops all of that for one line as he gains sentience and realizes that he's just the dumbest bag of bones in the universe. It's hilarious. I can't feasibly do it justice, and it deserves to live in your ears.

Now that Rito has failed, Zedd changes tactics and demands to meet Finster's new monster. Finster announces that his new monster represents Kimberly, as he personifies where all broken dreams end up. Introducing: Garbage Mouth!

Garbage Mouth
 AKA: Trash Talk

But Zedd doesn't simply want Garbage Mouth to go murder the Power Rangers. He has something different in mind. Lord Zedd commands his new monster to kidnap Katherine, as she is their broken dream. His end goal is to make sure that she pays for breaking her contract with the villains.

That's actually pretty cool. Zedd is taking the loss of his spy as a personal affront, so he's sending his trash can ghoul to make sure she doesn't get away until she knows why you never double cross Big Daddy Z.

Aisha congratulates Kimberly, and informs her that the doctor said she'll be out of the hospital in a few days. Rocky asks when she plans on getting back to training for the games, but Kimberly states that she's not going to be participating. She doesn't want to take the risk (???) and has decided to anchor herself to this franchise for all of eternity. Kim uses her best Satoru Iwata impression, and asks her friends to "please understand." Tommy gibbers like an ape for a few seconds, and then everyone leaves Kim's room in confusion.

The Ranger Teens discuss why they think Kimberly wants to quit gymnastics, and nobody can seem to find a concrete answer. For some reason, nobody comes to the conclusion that Kim might want to quit gymnastics because she almost died doing them last night. Katherine says she might understand what's going on, but before she can say anything she's kidnapped by Garbage Mouth and a flock of Tengas. Because the episode was running short and we needed another Tenga scene to truck it along.

The Ranger Teens morph while Garbage Mouth holds Katherine back. Even though he can teleport to the depths of outer space, he chooses to watch his battalion of birds fight a bunch of nimrods in latex costumes. Oh well, I'm sure this decision won't bite him in the ass about 12 seconds from now.

After detaining the Tengas, our heroes corner Garbage Mouth and demand he release Katherine. Garbage Mouth protests that he isn't here to fight them, and only wants to take this Aussie back to the Moon with him. For some reason, I kind of like that. He isn't twirling his moustache about how bad he's going to murder some power kids. He just wants to take this hostage and bug out. Stop trying to turn all of this into some karate bullshit, you weirdos.

While Garbage Mouth tries to get away, Katherine stomps on his foot and escapes his grasp. This incenses the monster, who proceeds to blast the Rangers for getting in his way. Katherine is also quite close to these attacks, but thankfully she's protected by her super powered allies.

Power Rangers gif
PLEASE PROTECT ME DEFENSELESS TEENAGE GIRL!

After Rocky courageously hides behind an unarmed civilian cat hybrid, the Rangers instruct Katherine to hide inside the hospital with Kimberly. Phew! Problem solved. Rita and Zedd may send moon monsters to murder children, but they would never go inside of a hospital. I'm sure if the moon devil tries to kidnap our new friend, our chronically-ill team member will be able to protect her for sure.

Rita and Zedd get tired of their monsters' failures and turn him into a giant. The Rangers respond by making some inane quip about recycling and summoning their Shogunzords. The five Shogunzords pose at Garbage Mouth, but he responds by whipping out a massive trash can and sucking all five of them inside. He seals it with a lid before saying the following.

"Since I hold the leftover pieces of broken dreams, you can stay here forever. And dream of what might have been!"

I do not know why. I could be absolutely bonkers. But I absolutely fucking love this line. You would expect the monster to say something more to the effect of "HAHA I HAVE TRASHED YOU." Instead, he tells these five high schoolers that he has ended their futures, and they can spend the rest of their mortal lives wishing they could do more. It's surprisingly stark compared to the rest of this show's usual fare.

Y'know what? I don't care what anybody else thinks. I love this dialogue from the blue trash lizard. Fight me irl, and I'll kick all your butts!!!

The Shogunzords refuse to have their futures cut off, and use some bullshit magic attack to blow open Garbage Mouth's trash can. This knocks the monster off balance, and gives the Shogunzords time to fuse into the Shogun Megazord. Garbage Mouth reveals a sword from out of goddamn nowhere and charges the goliath mecha. This produces some less than stellar results.

Someone's about to take out the trash.

After belting Garby in the mouth, the Shogun Megazord whips out its fire saber and slashes him down the middle. Hopefully next week we can get a monster who stops having badass lines and returns to a bunch of worthless guffawing puns revolving around whatever vague concept the creature is based on. Woof.

Rita and Zedd throw a royal shitfit now that their trash gecko has been burned alive. Zedd demands to know how they're supposed to murder those stupid kids and get revenge on their old cat.  Zedd concludes that they'd need a bargaining chip to get Katherine away from the safety of the Power Rangers, but can't figure out what that would be. Rita interrupts him to remind her dear husband that they just so happen to have Ninjor trapped inside of a bottle for just such an occasion. You can be forgiven if you forgot about him being here, what with the fact his toy is currently lining the bargain bins.

Tommy and Billy walk with Katherine and continue to discuss Kimberly's situation. Tommy is particularly concerned. Not because of Kim's distressing health issues, but because she doesn't want to do a sport. That'd be like if someone offered Tommy a shiny new belt for kicking people in cloaks and he turned them down. Are we living in some sort of topsy-turvy Dr. Seuss world?

Suddenly, Rita and Rito show up to harass our heroes. Tommy demands to know what they want, and Rita declares that they want their kitty cat back. When Tommy refuses, Rita and Rito laugh and…disappear? It's a shame we had to have two Tenga fights and couldn't take the time to make this moment not play like absolute dogshit.

But there was a perfectly good reason for their presence! Rita has dropped a ransom note that states Katherine must be returned to them by the end of the day. If she isn't, then Ninjor will be thrown into the Sea of Sorrow where he will remain forever.

Which is probably a better ending for him than how he's treated next season.




TO BE CONTINUED



Your Weekly 90's Nostalgia:  Ransom Notes



Personal Thoughts


First off, thank you all tremendously for the really nice comments you left on the last post. I loved reading what everyone had to say about Season 3 and their feeling on its quality. I'm glad I'm not the only who feels a bit mixed on it, but that's irrelevant for now. I sincerely appreciate the thoughts you good folks left, and I'll try and work through my writer's block without accepting defeat next time. I'm really sorry if I left anyone without something to read last Monday, and I hope this post had enough of a kick to it.

So the episode itself? I actually liked it. I remember watching this when I was younger and seriously liking it, in spite of the fucking garbage can monster. Mostly because of little moments like Rito dropping all pretense and realizing what a screw-up he is, and the aforementioned line from Garbage Mouth. That struck such a chord with me and turned what should have been a completely forgettable monster into something way more interesting.

I like the fact that Zedd and Rita take Kat's betrayal so personally as well. It gives them a bit more depth than "Ah curses, our plan has failed. Now to stew about it while Goldar growls and Squatt says something about food." They're petty, but that fits what we know about them. I appreciate any attempt to expand on these characters we've known for nearly 150 episodes. In case anyone was wondering, I'm a pretty easy guy to please.

Something worth mentioning is the battle between the Shogun Megazord and Garbage Mouth. In Kakuranger, this was the Shogun Megazord's debut fight. This might explain why it's portrayed as so utterly unfazed by anything the monster does to it. Though this will sadly not remain a constant, as the Shogun Megazord fights will soon become some of the lamest mecha action this franchise will ever see. But we'll talk about that in a few weeks. Take it easy!






17 comments:

  1. I was not as fond of this episode as you, it feels very much like they had time to burn. There's more tengas than I ever needed in one episode, the 90s hospital is a boring limbo where nothing ever happens, and they needed every single shot of zord footage they could get their hands on, to the point that they followed through on Rocky of all people leading the Megazord formation.

    I dig the monster but have always been curious about what's written on it's face and why.

    I also love how Rito shows up:
    [Rito strides up] "Hey, sis!"
    [A moment's pause, Rita & Zedd slowly look up to see Rito]
    All three of them: "GAAAH!"
    It doesn't even make any sense at all, really, and it's still great. It looks like the kind of thing that had to happen because the filmed actors reacted that way and the voice people simply went with it in ADR.

    How lazy is this episode? It's end credits outtakes are from the previous episode.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. His face has "Welcome to Jailhouse" written on it (but with a couple missing letters I think) because in Kakuranger he was posing as a policeman and had taken over a police station.

      Delete
    2. That's right, you can read "J-L-house" that way. I like all the English words scrawled onto the Kakuranger monsters!

      The credits outtakes can get weird when they're taken from different episodes, but what I got sick of this season was how many of them were scripted Bulk & Skull scenes that were excised for time--so why could they not just show those scenes in their original contexts and print the credits over the actual final scene? Too committed to this format already?

      Delete
    3. Oh yeah the hospital and Tenga stuff were pretty tedious, particularly because they've officially ran out of Cool Ninja Tricks for the Rangers to do. Turning Adam giant and having Adam clone himself were both really cool, but now what are they doing? Bunch of nothing.

      I love them all reacting to Rito in shock too! It was as if they realized that the whole Moon Crew are nothing but a bunch of undeniable cosmic horrors. I know it doesn't make sense for them to come to this conclusion now, but it still made me smile.

      I feel like I should be saying something about the outtakes, but man...I don't know. What is there to say? "Zedd and company dance in this one for 30 seconds" Don't get me wrong, it's cool they have something unique in the credits. I just don't really care? When those credits are rolling, I'm done writin'.

      Delete
    4. The credits are at least more fun than Dave Mallow telling you everything you're about to see happen in the episode in 30 seconds, but I haven't had to think about those teasers much as Netflix doesn't include them, and the one interesting thing to mention about them will come at the end of Alien Rangers. I am curious to know if any episodes had teasers after this season, though. (Did VR Troopers?)

      Delete
  2. Now does Garbage Mouth merely represent where broken dreams go, or did Finster actually make him out of broken dreams because metaphysical scraps have become easier for Finster to gather than more special clay?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'd imagine every single monster Finster has ever sent out would return in the form of nothing but broken dreams, so they're probably readily accessible for him.

      Delete
  3. I am pretty sure Garbage Mouth was using a pun during the zord battle. I always heard his line as "Since I hold the leftover pieces of broken dreams, you can stay here forever. And dream of what might have BIN!"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ...Please don't do this to me Marcbabe. I need to believe it was just something cool. I can't let a pun tear my life asunder.

      Not again.

      Delete
    2. There comes a day when we must accept the truth that all is pun and pun is all.

      Delete
  4. Best part is seeing the shogun megazord completely no sell the sword shots from garbage mouth. I know you hate him but I♡ muteki shogun

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't seriously hate the Shogun Megazord, just that some of its fights are horrendously lackluster. Particularly the ones where it does nothing but show up and instantly use the finisher. I enjoyed that the Ninja Megazord would at least sometimes do some cool shit before finishing off monsters.

      Muteki Shogun is a baller design though. Don't get me wrong. I was just always a bigger fan of Kakure Dai Shogun.

      Delete
    2. Fair enough bud I like em both but muteki shogun is my favourite megazord of all time kakure comes around 3rd or 4th can't decide between that and the zeo megazord.
      I would like some longer fights with him too and we do get that a little bit later on but the main thing I think kakuranger was going for with him is he is the invincible general. Muteki literally means invincible so in that sense he lives up to his name very strong and disposes normal monsters instantly. :)

      Delete
  5. JDF's "Serious Acting Voice" is so definitely a thing.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Apropos of nothing, I love the Shogun Megazord by virtue of the fact that it looks like a Megazord with twice the armor plating. Monsters should regularly be hitting it to no effect.

    I haven't played a Mechwarrior game since Mechwarrior 2: Mercenaries, but it's like the Atlas mech: no, it's not going to get anywhere quickly, but that's OK because it is going to get there and there's not enough ordinance to stop it.

    ReplyDelete
  7. It took me all week to realize that we had jumped from episode 23 to episode 29.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I'm glad you realized it, because I sure didn't. Whoops!

    ReplyDelete